Now that you know a lot of my general background, at least the bad destructive stuff, let me share with you one of the many problems that arose out of my poor self image/worth. From early on I became a “People Pleaser”. Since I got my self worth from my ability to get people to like me and to keep them liking me, I would do anything for anyone…I couldn’t say no.
In many respects this isn’t necessarily a bad thing if you are doing it for the right reasons. But I was doing it to feel good about myself. I got my self worth from people liking me which lead to people using me and people using me made me feel worse about myself.
Not only did I feel worse about myself, but I actually started to dislike and resent people. My inability to say no made me angry at the entire human race. I started seeing people as greedy users of people who take advantage of people for their own gain. Problem was that that was where my self esteem came from. A nasty cycle I didn’t know how to break. Here’s what I’ve recently learned.
There is only one source for our self-worth, self-esteem and self-respect…it’s God. God of the universe. God who knew you before you were born and knitted you in your mother’s womb. God who has the hairs on your head numbered. God who loves you more than any earthly human ever could. A God who sent His one and only Son to DIE FOR YOU! He loves us that much and if you truly grasp that…then and only then can you shift your source of self worth to the One who made you, who breathed life into you. You are special. You are made in the image of almighty God…you are a son or daughter of the Most High King. Wear that proudly and know that if He is with you, then who can stand against you. Get a proper self image and the correct source and you won’t desire to please people, but to please your maker.
Set it in your heart that your Daddy loves you and you want to please HIM. If you run decisions through that filter either you will be empowered to say no to those situations that don’t please Him…or when you say Yes…it will be to please HIM!